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Band of Sisters

This project explores the 100-year history of families living with wounded veterans. It includes interviews with 30 individuals about their experiences and has produced a children’s book titled “One Hundred Jumping Beans” to support military families dealing with PTSD, injury, and relocation.

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An interview with

Michele Apter

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An interview with

Julie White

Supporting a veteran whose service career affects their quality of life can be hard work....
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An interview with

Linda Rudkin

Linda Rudkin’s husband Colin served with the Royal Green Jackets in Northern Ireland during the...
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An interview with

Kate Boe

Kate Boe served in the Royal Air Force as a nurse, where she met her...
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An interview with

Jenny Bottomley

Jenny Bottomley is married to Daniel – a former Royal Marine Commando who served in...
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An interview with

Fiona Hossell

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An interview with

Heather Lake

Heather Lake’s husband served with the Royal Logistics Corps as a chef. He was diagnosed...
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An interview with

Kirsty Green

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An interview with

Louise Reynolds

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An interview with

Ulrike Clarke

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An interview with

Vikki Foley

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An interview with

Zoe Meakin

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About Band of Sisters

In 2019, Legasee Educational Trust partnered with Help for Heroes’ Band of Sisters to document the lived experiences of families supporting wounded veterans. Through 30 candid interviews with parents, partners, and children, the project uncovered the profound challenges faced by those living with veterans affected by both physical and emotional injuries, particularly Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD).

Research Paper
The Progression of the Understanding of UK Military Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder from WW1 to the Present Day, and The Role of Family in Veteran Mental Health Care, provides a vital contribution to the study of PTSD and its ripple effects on families. Combining historical analysis and first-hand accounts, it examines the evolution of PTSD understanding within the British military, highlighting the critical yet often unseen role of families in veteran care.

These unique perspectives shed light on the emotional toll of military service, offering insights that escape traditional clinical or veteran-centric studies. By amplifying these voices, the paper aims to influence future approaches to supporting both veterans and their families. To request a copy of the research paper, get in touch.

One Hundred Jumping Beans
As part of the Band of Sisters project, we created One Hundred Jumping Beans, a children’s book designed to support young readers in military families. This collection of stories addresses the unique challenges faced by children living with parents affected by PTSD, physical injuries, or frequent relocations due to military postings.

The idea for the book grew out of discussions with the Catterick Library Service, who highlighted the lack of resources for children coping with these experiences. To fill this gap, Legasee worked with Le Cateau Primary School, author Paula Rogers, and illustrator Geraldine Sierra to run workshops that gave children the opportunity to shape the book’s characters and stories. This collaborative approach ensured the content resonated directly with young readers, tackling sensitive topics in a way that is accessible and engaging.

One Hundred Jumping Beans aims to provide comfort, understanding, and hope to military families navigating the challenges of service life. To request a copy of the book, get in touch.

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Educational Resources - Longdendale
An interview with

Michele Apter

A Mother’s Battle: Michele’s Fight to Keep Her Sons Safe After War

Content warning//

This interview contains discussions of sensitive topics such as PTSD, depression and suicidal thoughts which some viewers may find distressing. If you are affected by these topics, please consider seeking support from a trusted person or organisation.   Michele's family tree shows military men from both world wars, so it was no surprise when two of her sons joined the military. Tours of Iraq, and physical and mental injuries has meant that Michele has struggled to keep her sons safe since they left the army, and after numerous suicide attempts Michele's own mental health has suffered significantly.
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Interviewed by:
Martin Bisiker
An interview with

Julie White

Julie expresses her gratitude for Help for Heroes and hopes she can be a voice of experience and support for others.

Julie came from a military family with her father, uncle and grandfather all having served. Julie and Melvin met in their 40s, both having had previous marriages and families. Melvin had retired from the army by then and rarely talks about it but Julie knows he suffered a back injury during Desert Storm One. Melvin was also in a military band which took him all over the world but also meant standing for hours in all weathers. Over the years, Melvin has had terrible problems with his back but now his knees are causing problems too. Help for Heroes have helped Melvin find physiotherapy while the Band of Brothers group has provided a lifeline through advice and camaraderie. Julie has joined Band of Sisters and finds herself being one of the oldest in the group and able to share her life experiences. She enjoys the respite weekends and has also taken part in a number of courses. She admires the younger generation and what they are going through and both she and Melvin volunteer as much as they can to give back to the charity, and people, that have helped them so much.
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Interviewed by:
Martin Bisiker
An interview with

Linda Rudkin

Linda Rudkin’s Story: Supporting a Veteran with PTSD Amid New Battles

Content warning//

This interview contains discussions of sensitive topics such as PTSD, depression and suicidal thoughts which some viewers may find distressing.

If you are affected by these topics, please consider seeking support from a trusted person or organisation.

  Linda Rudkin’s husband Colin served with the Royal Green Jackets in Northern Ireland during the Troubles. What happened to him there has stayed with him all his life. Watch as Linda describes how Colin's experiences there led to PTSD, and their fight to get the right treatment for him As if their situation wasn't difficult enough already, now the Government's legacy enquiries are adding unwanted stress.
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Interviewed by:
Martin Bisiker
An interview with

Kate Boe

Kate shares the details of her husband’s PTSD and their difficult journey for treatment.

Content warning// This interview contains discussions of sensitive topics such as PTSD, suicidal thoughts and vivid flashback description which some viewers may find distressing. If you are affected by these topics, please consider seeking support from a trusted person or organisation.   Kate was training to be a nurse with the RAF when she met her husband-to-be, John, an RAF Police Officer. They both completed tours of Iraq and John went on to complete one more and also two tours of Afghanistan. Each time John returned, Kate started to notice slight differences in his character, such as an increase in drinking and frequent nightmares. She was grateful of both her RAF and medical training as it helped her understand the mental shift between home and work that John was having to manage. John sought help but was told there was nothing medically wrong and he was to carry on as usual, which he did. It was the birth of their son that Kate thinks caused John’s nightmares and flashbacks to intensify. He sought help again and this time was diagnosed with severe PTSD and signed off work, but without his job to provide a sense of purpose John struggled to function. John tried both CBT and EMDR therapies but Kate feels they both made the situation worse. John is now on a medication pathway. Kate describes this as an incredibly isolating time as no one knew what she was going through. She felt she could hardly leave John alone, especially when he started having suicidal thoughts. However, when she joined Band of Sisters she found a supportive group of women with shared experiences. She even managed to attend a weekend away which really helped her realise how stressed she was. She describes finding Band of Sisters as a real turning point which helped her realise she needed to take care of herself too. John has also found help through Help for Heroes and has attended a few courses and is now a qualified bushcraft and survival instructor. John has recently had a cancer diagnosis and Kate reflects that, sadly, the cancer process has been much smoother than the PTSD. Kate feels it is incredibly important for others to hear their story so they know they are not alone. She is even compiling a book.
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Interviewed by:
Martin Bisiker
An interview with

Jenny Bottomley

A detailed and emotional account of supporting a Royal Marine Commander partner after he is injured on tour in Afghanistan.

CONTENT WARNING: This interview contains graphic details of injuries, which some viewers may find distressing. If you are affected by these topics, please consider seeking support from a trusted person or organisation. Jenny recounts how she met her now-husband, Daniel, when they were training with the Bolton Sea Cadets as teenagers. At the age of 19, Daniel began training for the Royal Marines. He was deployed shortly after completing his training and undertook two tours in Afghanistan. During his second tour, Daniel stepped on an IED and sustained injuries to his left hand and foot, resulting in amputation and requiring multiple skin grafts. Jenny describes the moment that Daniel’s parents arrived at her workplace while Daniel was on tour and anticipating the worst news. Throughout her interview, Jenny provides detailed information about Daniel’s injuries and surgeries. Jenny and Daniel are now married with one child and another on the way, and Dan has started his own business providing inspirational speaking to others who have experienced similar events. This account highlights the practical aspects of adapting to life-changing injuries and achieving personal and professional goals. Jenny would like her children and others to learn about the ‘war of our time’, which is why she has chosen to share her story.
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Interviewed by:
Martin Bisiker
An interview with

Heather Lake

A story of support and sisterhood after dealing with a husband’s PTSD diagnosis and deteriorating health conditions.

Heather Lake recounts her experience of meeting and marrying Andy while they worked together as Army Chefs. They became engaged and married within six months. Heather had noticed indications of Andy's mental health issues from the start. Andy had completed tours in Northern Ireland and Bosnia prior to meeting Heather. During his tour in Bosnia, Andy sustained injuries from a building collapse, leading to his discharge from the kitchen he was working in at the time. Heather describes one significant event that occurred while Andy was changing his daughter's nappy, resulting in social services removing him from contact with his daughter for 18 months. Andy received an official diagnosis of PTSD only a few years ago and experienced physical decline after his injuries. He is now often confined to a wheelchair. Heather anticipates that an upcoming operation might improve their situation. Heather found support through the Band of Sisters, which she joined through Andy, a member of the Band of Brothers. This group offered her a sense of community and non-judgement. Heather's story reflects dedication and commitment to her family’s happiness. The Band of Sisters provides her with the support she needs as she continues to support her family.
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Interviewed by:
Martin Bisiker
An interview with

Kirsty Green

Kirsty shares the story of her partner’s debilitating injury and its affect on their lives.

Content warning// This interview contains discussions of sensitive topics such as PTSD and addiciton which some viewers may find distressing. If you are affected by these topics, please consider seeking support from a trusted person or organisation.   Kirsty’s partner, Glenn, completed two tours of Afghanistan but it was a tragic accident during a training exercise that turned their lives upside down. Glenn was parachuting down from 30 000 feet when he was blown off course, landed in a tree then fell to the ground. The result was a devastating spinal injury. After a period in hospital, Glenn comes home and Kirsty works hard to keep their lives on track while holding down her job and taking care of Glenn. The couple had never really spent a great deal of time living together before this and it puts a strain on their relationship, especially when Glenn is prescribed morphine which he struggles with. Glenn spends a period at the Headley Court rehabilitation centre where he receives regular medication and physiotherapy but without access to this at home, Kirsty notices a big difference in Glenn’s behaviour. He becomes increasingly angry, he won’t leave the house and Kirsty starts to suspect he has PTSD. Kirsty suggest they get a dog and this becomes a big help as Glenn has to take responsibility for it. Kirsty is even impressed that she managed to get Glenn on a holiday to Cuba. While Glenn is still managing tremendous pain he is also working hard on his rehabilitation and can walk for short periods. Kirsty reflects that they both had to grow up very quickly to be able to deal with this trauma. This experience made Kirsty realise she wants more from her life and she is now training to be a nurse. Although Kirsty joined Band of Sisters she admits it took her a while to fully engage. She wants to share her story so other know about the help and support available, she wonders if she had asked for help sooner might this have been an easier process.
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Interviewed by:
Martin Bisiker
An interview with

Louise Reynolds

Louise Reynolds: Life, Love, and the Hidden Wounds of Military Service

Content warning// This interview contains discussions of sensitive topics such as PTSD, depression and suicidal thoughts which some viewers may find distressing. If you are affected by these topics, please consider seeking support from a trusted person or organisation.

Louise Reynolds has been married to Chris Reynolds for 20 years, sharing a life shaped by his service in the infantry as a rifleman and ambulance driver. Originally from Doncaster, Chris served three tours, working gruelling shifts and long days. His deployment to Iraq during Operation Telic was particularly harrowing, with limited resources and intense danger. In one instance, he saved a fellow soldier who lost his arm in an accident. Meanwhile, Louise entered military life with a romanticised vision of adventure and travel, but quickly realised its reality was far different. Constant upheaval, isolation, and the loss of her own identity made Louise find solace in the close-knit community of army wives in Germany.  Chris’s return from his final tour marked the beginning of an uphill battle. Withdrawn and irritable, he struggled with PTSD. Despite the medical team’s support, the army’s dismissive attitude repeatedly undermined his recovery. Sent on a life-fire exercise in Canada despite his worsening condition, Chris called Louise in a state of distress, leading to his urgent return to the UK. Facing stigma and little support, they fought for his medical discharge after 15 years of service. Adjusting to civilian life also proved challenging. Though the Combat Stress charity provided some treatment, Louise often felt alone in managing the daily impact. She recalls Chris longing for visible scars as proof of his suffering to a world that couldn’t see his wounds. Their turning point came through Phoenix House, Band of Brothers, and Band of Sisters. Louise highlights the importance of these networks; Chris’s journey led him to speak at a school about mental health. Now, Louise, dedicates herself to fundraising for mental health initiatives, determined to ensure that other families receive similar support.
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Interviewed by:
Paula Rogers
An interview with

Ulrike Clarke

Ulrike candidly opens up about her partner’s journey to a PTSD diagnosis and treatment, as well as her own mental health challenges.

Content warning// This interview contains discussions of sensitive topics such as PTSD, depression and suicidal thoughts which some viewers may find distressing. If you are affected by these topics, please consider seeking support from a trusted person or organisation.   German Uli met her partner Alex while he was working for the Professional Service Guard. He had previously served for almost 18 years with the Royal Logistics Corp and Uli knew bits and pieces about Alex’s time in Northern Ireland and Sierra Leone. In 2015 Uli noticed that Alex was becoming quieter and retreating into himself, he admitted that he was feeling depressed. Alex was diagnosed with PTDS. It was recommended that Alex join Band of Brothers for support and that Uli join Band of Sisters. She didn’t think she would need assistance herself but wanted to find out more about supporting someone through PTSD and depression. Uli is incredibly open about Alex’s symptoms of depression, anxiety, being hyper alert and burying his emotions. The more stories she heard from the Band of Sisters, she became incredibly grateful that Alex was never physically or verbally abusive. Alex’s treatment was slow and it took a very long time, and a great deal of pain to manage, before he was also diagnosed with fibromyalgia, or chronic pain syndrome. Thankfully, he had Uli to chase and advocate on his behalf but he now lives with extreme pain on a daily basis. Uli describes how she used to try and be superwoman for Alex but it all became too much. She worried so much about him, especially when he had suicidal thoughts. Uli sought help and was given medication and also undertook therapy with Hidden Wounds which she says was brilliant. The Band of Sisters has also been a terrific support. Not only is there always someone there who knows what you are going through, Uli has also been involved in numerous fundraising activities such as trekking in Cambodia. But Uli knows the road ahead is still difficult, she confesses she has had dark thoughts herself and only by opening up did she realise these were likely caused by her medication. She admits she never puts herself first and hopes that by sharing her and Alex’s story it will help others to reach out and find help.
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Interviewed by:
Martin Bisiker
An interview with

Vikki Foley

Vikki candidly opens up about her husband’s tours of Afghanistan and the toll they took on his mental health and their marriage.

Content warning// This interview contains discussions of sensitive topics such as PTSD which some viewers may find distressing. If you are affected by these topics, please consider seeking support from a trusted person or organisation. Vikki and Chris were teenagers when they met and enjoyed a fun, loving relationship. Sadly, this changed when Chris was posted to Afghanistan. Chris’ battalion were hit badly and suffered a lot of casualties, including the death of Chris’ friend, which caused Chris to become very angry. He wanted to stay and fight rather than return home. It was a confusing and isolating time for Vikki, she didn’t know how to help Chris or have anyone to talk to. When Chris returned, Vikki noticed that he was very jumpy as well as angry and drinking a lot more. Chris’ anger escalated so much that Vikki insisted he seek help. Chris was set on a path of PTSD treatment but appointments and treatment were sporadic. He then passed all checks and was cleared for a second tour of Afghanistan. Vikki was incredibly worried about Chris but the big difference for her this time was that they were now living in married quarters so she had other wives and friends around to draw support from. When Chris returns, this time his change in behaviour is so noticeable that he is downgraded to lighter duties at work which made him angrier still. Vikki wishes that she had spoken up more and demanded help for Chris but is incredibly grateful that the birth of their son did mark a positive change in Chris’ behaviour. Chris’ discharge in 2015 was a stressful period when the family suddenly had to find somewhere to live. Thankfully they found a home through a veteran’s housing association which was a massive benefit to both as it meant they were surrounded by neighbours who could relate to their situation. Vikki also thinks being in the NHS system of treatment worked better for Chris as he could open up more rather than feeling he was letting the military down. Vikki also joined Band of Sisters where she values the support and does her best to support others too. She also wrote a poem which was chosen to be turned into a song for the Invictus Games. Vikki acknowledges there were some very dark days and is sad to think of all the ex-military personnel, and their families, left to struggle with their demons. For a long time she felt there was no one else like her but through opening up she has found incredible support and sisterhood and wants others to know they are not alone.
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Interviewed by:
Martin Bisiker
An interview with

Zoe Meakin

An inspiring story of a military wife who fought hard to get the right support for her husband and her family after an incident led to severe PTSD and physical injuries.

Zoe Meakin, a military wife and mother, shares her journey of balancing work and family during her husband's military career. After meeting Dallas and getting engaged within a few months, Zoe focused on her career as a midwife while Dallas served in the military, noticing changes in him when he returned from tours. After having two children together, they travelled to various countries with Dallas’ work but later returned to the UK. Dallas changed roles to work in the prison guard service but suffered physical and mental injuries after an incident at work, eventually being diagnosed with severe PTSD. This also affected their children, who no longer recognised their father. Zoe used her NHS role to secure support for her husband and children despite many challenges. Initially not engaging with support that was offered to her as a military wife, Zoe recently connected with the Band of Sisters and attended a well-earned respite weekend. She remains in contact with other military partners she met there who have all been through similar life events. Her inspirational story highlights her dedication to both her family and career as she works hard to get the support her family needs.
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Interviewed by:
Martin Bisiker